🍼 Diapers Off: The Adult Choice to Stop Grumbling and Grow Up
- Thad DeBuhr
- 5 days ago
- 8 min read
NEHEMIAH 30 Day Challenge: DAY 22
Sarah had everything she thought she needed: a great job, a beautiful home, a loving family, and a strong faith. Yet, every Monday morning, a low-grade anxiety would settle over her. She felt like a hamster on a wheel—busy, productive, but going nowhere. She constantly grumbled about her schedule, her lack of control, and how much her job demanded. She prayed for relief, but the weight never lifted. "God, I follow You," she often prayed, "I’m in the Promised Land of blessing, so why do I still feel so unfree? Why does life feel like endless servitude to circumstances I can't control?"
If you've ever felt the tension of being a Christian with great blessings, yet still weighed down by persistent difficulties, you share a painful kinship with the people of Israel who returned from exile. Their constant struggle—and their initial reaction of blame—is a perfect picture of spiritual infancy.
The Hard Truth: You can be an adult of any age, a long-time Christian, and still remain a spiritual infant. An infant is defined by dependence, self-focus, and communication primarily through crying and complaining (grumbling). If you don't want to remain in the diaper stage forever, learning the difference between a childish grumble and a mature, heartfelt plea is a lesson you simply must learn.
Before you dig into the story, I would encourage you to read through the passage in two different bible translations from this list: NIV, NLT, NASB, ESV, NKJV
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Setting the Scene: The Cry of Maturity 🏛️
The people returning from Babylonian exile were physically back in Jerusalem, but spiritually, many were still like demanding toddlers. This final section of the Great Confession (Nehemiah chapter 9, verses 32 through 38) marks their crucial step toward maturity.
The Reality of Servitude: The people were still subject to foreign kings (Nehemiah chapter 9, verses 36 through 37). They had lost their full freedom because of their ancestors' sins. When an infant is hungry, they cry and blame the milk or the diaper. The immature Israelite might have complained and blamed Persia, Babylon, or even God.
The Mature Response: The elders, led by Ezra and Nehemiah, took the mature path. They confessed: "But you have been righteous in everything that has happened to us, for you have dealt faithfully with us, while we have been wicked." (Nehemiah chapter 9, verse 33, NLT).
This is the sign of spiritual maturity:
Grumbling/Complaining (Infancy): This focuses on self and blame. It emphasizes how unfair the situation is, seeks to find an external fault, and demands comfort.
Heartfelt Plea (Maturity): This focuses on God's character and ownership. It emphasizes:
Acknowledge Truth: Admitting God is righteous, even in the judgment (ownership).
Appeal to Character: Asking for relief based only on His "unfailing love" and faithfulness (Nehemiah chapter 9, verse 32, NLT), not on personal merit.
The lesson for us is profound: Spiritual growth is marked by moving from blaming others (grumbling) to confessing one's own role and appealing to God’s greatness (heartfelt plea).
Applying it Today: Diapers Off, Growth On 📈
The people's mature response led to a firm covenant (Nehemiah chapter 9, verse 38, NLT). Moving from infancy to maturity involves a direct change in how we pray and live.
Step 1: Replace Grumbling with Confession (Ownership)
Stop focusing on what others or circumstances owe you; start focusing on your own responsibilities and God's righteousness.
🛑 Doing it Wrong (Infant Grumbling): "My boss is unfair, my workload is impossible, and I deserve a break. Why is this so hard?" (Focus on victimhood and blame.)
✅ Doing it Right (Adult Confession): "God, I confess my lack of discipline in my schedule and acknowledge my own part in overcommitting. You are righteous in allowing this stress to expose my weakness."
Step 2: Replace Demand with Appeal (Focus)
Instead of demanding God fix your situation, appeal to His established, faithful character.
🛑 Doing it Wrong (Infant Demanding): "Lord, if You take away this debt/conflict right now, I'll stop doing [bad thing] and be good." (Bargaining and focusing on personal gain.)
✅ Doing it Right (Adult Pleading): "Great and mighty God, I do not deserve relief, but because You are a God who keeps His covenant of unfailing love, I beg for Your mercy and wisdom. Show me the next right step."
Step 3: Replace Waiting with Consecration (Action)
Spiritual maturity is proven by action. Respond to God’s mercy with a concrete commitment to change.
🛑 Doing it Wrong (Infant Procrastination): "I hope I'll eventually learn how to handle this better, but I'm too overwhelmed to start now." (Vague hope without effort.)
✅ Doing it Right (Adult Commitment): "I am making a firm promise to change my pattern. This week, I will prioritize my time by committing to a daily 15-minute prayer and will budget $50 less on non-essentials, trusting Your provision."
Questions to Chew on and Discuss:
Identifying Infancy: When faced with stress or consequence, is your first instinct to grumble (complain, blame, or excuse) or to confess (own up to your part, or acknowledge God's right to judge)?
The High Road: The people stated, "You have been righteous in everything that has happened to us..." (Nehemiah chapter 9, verse 33, NLT). What does it look like in your life to give God credit for being just and righteous even when you are suffering a consequence you feel you earned?
The Covenant: Spiritual adults make commitments. The chapter ends with a firm covenant (Nehemiah chapter 9, verse 38, NLT). What commitment must you make today to ensure this lesson translates into lasting spiritual growth?
Journey Group Discussion Starter:
The difference between a grumble and a plea is the difference between a spiritual infant and a spiritual adult.
Question: Think of one specific burden or difficulty you have recently complained or grumbled about. Now, try to rewrite that complaint into a mature, heartfelt plea for God's mercy and help. Share both the original grumble and the new plea with the group.
✨ Bonus Tip for Faster Growth: Write Out Your Prayers
One of the best techniques for quickly transitioning out of the spiritual infant stage is to start writing out your prayers in a journal.
The simple, intentional act of physically writing out your prayers requires discipline. Discipline is a spiritual muscle that is essential for development and growth as a disciple, and writing forces you to engage it.
Furthermore, writing creates a mirror for your soul:
Identify the Grumble: By seeing your thoughts written on the page, you gain clarity on what you're truly saying to God. You will often quickly identify grumbling, complaining, comparing, or blaming hidden in your thoughts.
Course Correct: Once a complaint is visible, you get the immediate opportunity to course correct right there on the page. You can intentionally rewrite your prayer to drop the complaining and switch to a more mature, heartfelt plea of confession and appeal to God's character, just like the elders in Nehemiah chapter 9.
Start by writing out just one prayer a day for a week. See how quickly your perspective shifts from complaint to confession!
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